This is like some super duper overdue post. Last Friday, went out with Kyra, Arielle and Zi Xin. Supposed to be some "class" outing but ended up i guess no one "could make it". Notice the inverted commas. So ended up a small bonding session among the 4 pathetic souls left in the "class". We wanted to pool, but the last table was hogged by Ervin and his friends, so -cough cough-. Decided to catch Ice Age 3 instead. The movie wasn't as bad as expected. I expect it to be much more childish and not make any sense since it's targeted audience'd be most likely children. But wells, great sense of humor at times. After that went for dinner at Pastamania! And Kyra said this,

"Zhi Hua is weird today."
"Why?"
"Cause his not like this in school"
"Of course larh school-__-"

LOLS. I sounded like school was my worst hated place but no please. It's just too tiring in school for me to like go high and talk and basically be fun. Sometimes, i really wonder why i kept helping myself come up with 101 reasons why i wouldn't talk that much in school, realising it's actually myself whose the one actually not talking without any reason. Seriously, i think i just kept giving myself excuses such as i'm too tired, i've got nothing to say. Maybe it's true for some cases but i guess definitely not all. It's like this barrier i set myself up against everyone else, to i guess protect myself? Hmm, how i should i say, i was really scared of comments made? Like how it was last time? Perhaps now i'm still scared, but i'm not that certain. Still, keeping quiet was one way i used to keep myself from getting hurt, like seriously last time?..

Anyway, after dinner, we went pool. With a little bit of beginner's luck i managed to score the black ball. Haha, Hi-5 Arielle(: And Arielle was like trying to blow them away from the hole hahah XD Gosh, it was damn funny haha and how Kyra managed to score and let the white ball go in like 5 consecutive times hahaha. We should erm go pool again some other day(: Prob not this week, cause i guess i might get grounded for my term results *shucks*.

I watched the poor quality Transformers 1 online on Sun night. It was a nice movie i guess. Touching, got the wow feeling there. Like the fighting scenes and stuff. And chatted with lots of ppl till like what 3am? Hilarious convos and sad ones too. I'm like talking about the same topic on 2 convos but standing on two different ends of the arguments lurhh>_> The mark of a Hist student muhahahha. Talking about History, i kinda of miss Brian Tan, wait i'm not gay, his my History Elect teacher-.- His sacarsm is zomg lols. Ahh shucks i need to go back Fairfield and visit certain groups of people.

Mon was basically spent doing EOM and getting invited to random convos started by Nicholas. I guess that's all. Was intending to do more, but my friend procrastination stopped me lols.

School kids back to school! Like first day starting back on lectures and tuts and of course mass PE, like what the shit. Got back my Chem and i flunk it, got a subpass, or what's supposingly considered subpass. Like wts i was missing E by 1 mark and i lost it due to.. Carelessness-.-" Sigh, i'm not exactly sad about my results since i expected to not really score well for Chem anyways. I'm just worried for like other people hmm? And perhaps i should starting considering myself that i might just get so screwed when my parents know abt this ehh. It's not like they didn't expect it but yeah. Ahh whatever, tmrw will be a better day, i hope.

This is one of those nights where i feel like just sitting in a corner not doing anything but think and feel for stuff. Like seriously, i don't feel like doing anything, perhaps what R once called fatigue and i think i'm getting it. Apart from that, my locked up emotional self is trying to break free, thinking about things i shouldn't be, or at least BY RIGHT should be less important than what i'm supposed to be doing right now. But still.. I'm afraid of getting too close sometimes that you might just snap, leaving me alone, at the same time i'm keeping a distance away yet wanting a close level of proximity between us. Just what am i thinking.. I'm just yet another insecure being that after all needs affirmation.

At this point in time,
I wonder how close i should be to you.

Labels: Overdue, School